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Leaving-Please READ. (not permanently?)

Journal Entry: Wed Nov 7, 2012, 5:15 PM
So, I'm not going to be on dA for Idk how long. I feel like God really wants me to purge myself of all things Deviantart/Tumblr Related. There are things in my life that needs to get squared away. For too long I have made DA My GOD and I have quenched Jesus and shrunk him down to a little jesus I put on a shelf. I need to get my priorities right-and to do that-I believe I need to abstain from dA and tumblr.

DA..I love you guys. But like I said, I cannot keep serving two masters. I don't even think Shipping and drawing cute romantic stuff is good for me anymore. Rping is out of the question and no more romanticism here. My life has been a huge mess because of it-and I understand that not everyone needs to go this path, but I must for it is what God has called me into. I need to overcome these things and thus I have cleared out my gallery of anything sexual and sinful.

I have some skype friends and some facebook friends from dA....I'm clearing out my skype/facebook however, so if you dont wanna be deleted, go ahead and say so now. Otherwise, the only thing Im gonna do on the computer now is to draw (not gonna be posting) and be on youtube and google/skype.

Sorry you guys. but I really feel the Lord has put this into me...that I need to stop serving dA and feel like I have to PLEASE everyone. I know that was not your guys's intent, but My mind is imperfect and made things ultra legalistic. X_X OTL sorry.

I won't be posting, I won't even be logged in anymore. I won't be checking messages or doing more asks for the time being. Rather, I'm going to press into the Lord and draw holy things-and not sinful entertaining things.

I'm sorry if I sound weird, maybe even a bit crazy. But if the Lord tells you something, you do it. And who knows? i might be back sooner than later. But the goal is at least ONE month. If I can do at least one month without dA, I think I've got my priorities back in line. ;v;

I am sick and tired of pornographic images clogging my tumblr every time I look at a tag, and for the longest time I've debated about my DFH series and really thought if it was truly something God wants of me...? I don't know. I am sick and tired of seeing overly romantic and sometimes erotic-images in my DA watch list...It downright makes my life and struggle to be pure HARD. I want to abstain from sexual immorality. How can I do it if it's constantly in my face?! :|

Well. There it is. I'm gonna try my hardest to clean up my act, and to overcome these battles I am constantly having in my heart. I will still be in contact with those special few on Skype/msn/facebook. Butttttttt not really gonna be posting anything on here for at least a month.

It's time to do some soul-seeking. and I need a lot of inner healing and direction as of now. Keep me in Your prayers, and please, do the right thing. God bless every single one of you watchers. :') I will miss you guys of course, but I won't miss the temptations and the mixed images while trying to find out my identity in Christ.

Thank you so much! ;v; :heart:
(I might check in within a month or so....but who knows?)

Lord, I ask that you bless each and every one of my watchers, Father. Continue to be a source of light and strength for those that know you, and may you be a blessing for those who do not know you. Lord fill each and everyone of their hearts with your love and let them know above all else, they are loved. They are created in your image and are beautiful/handsome in every way shape and form. Lord you cancel out our debts and forgive us of our sins and Lord you are the love we all so deeply desire. Jesus, I ask that you bless their state/country/province/continent/town...Bless them with provision and anointing and give them strength to overcome many trials this life has. I speak Healing over them in the name of Jesus that they would receive fully what you have called them into, and may your kingdom reign above all else in this world. Thank you Lord for my Watchers, they are a great source of Joy and encouragement for me as well as criticism. Lord, you have blessed me with my talents such as drawing and writing, and Lord I commit to you once again and I lay down my pride for you. I ask that you fill me with your presence and that you would begin to take back what was hidden. Raise me up to be a great warrior for your truth, and May you mature me-even if it is painful at times-into the woman you so desire. I lift up my watchers to you, God. I love them, and you love them. Show them your love, Jesus.

  • Listening to: cars drive by
  • Reading: nothing
  • Watching: Gaki No Tsukai
  • Playing: nothing
  • Eating: nothing
  • Drinking: nothing
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Shikamaru9419 Featured By Owner Nov 17, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Thanks Alex, especially for the prayer. I hope that God speaks to you during this time, and that if it is his will that you could come back here.

God Bless

starleogirl09 Featured By Owner Nov 13, 2012
Best of luck to you as always, Alex!
The Lord will take great care of you :)
joboar13 Featured By Owner Nov 12, 2012  Student Writer
I hope you find your path and get things sorted out, Alex <3 Do your best! We will always be here waiting for you and we only wish for your well-being! Good luck :heart: ;v;
mattwilson83 Featured By Owner Nov 12, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
I'll miss you til you get back. Hug. I'll try coming on skype a bit more. :hug:
orange-yoshi Featured By Owner Nov 11, 2012
Good luck with it!
Picklemind Featured By Owner Nov 9, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
We'll miss you, but this is a really admirable decision. C: Good luck! You're in my prayers :la:
JessiRenee Featured By Owner Nov 9, 2012  Student General Artist
I'm praying for you! and I know how you feel... :clap: I know God is smiling on this decision of yours. He loves you! :hug:
Candyboss98 Featured By Owner Nov 9, 2012  Hobbyist
I will miss you soooo much! QAQ
starlight1216 Featured By Owner Nov 8, 2012
Same here, it seems. I do hope you will return, but I wish you all the best, and you will be in my prayers. I will miss you dearly and your DFH art. Those always brought a smile to my face. And thank you dearly for the kind wrote prayer you wrote for us. I needed something like that today. :hug:
May God bless you every moment, and may you come to know His endless love for you even more.
God bless, my sister in Christ!
LadyInteresting Featured By Owner Nov 8, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
I'm going to miss you, so much! But I respect your decision, God bless!
DaGaoPump Featured By Owner Nov 8, 2012
Don't be gone too long now! You can't leave us fan friends behind forever. Hope you find what your looking for. C:
WhiteRose810 Featured By Owner Nov 8, 2012
To be honest, i cried until i read that you're gonna (hopefully) come back :tears: If you feel you need to do it, that's your decision and no one can change it, so good luck and many prayers to you! ;)
HistoricalHamster Featured By Owner Nov 8, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Ah, I`ll miss you.
But I wish you all the best and do regain your priorities :)
Lone-wolf-cub Featured By Owner Nov 8, 2012
Good luck my friend! i would have messaged you sooner but alas hospital stays are so much fun....

IF you do see this keep me in ya Skype list ^_^ still wanna have ya there for the day ya come back

Again take care and God bless!
FeyAnime Featured By Owner Nov 8, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Part of me cheers for you. The other part of me knows it will miss you.
Either way, I wish you the best of luck.
May god bless you and keep you safe, until we (hopefully) meet again <3
Tori5 Featured By Owner Nov 7, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Ummm... well, good luck, I suppose?
FaerianaShalanor Featured By Owner Nov 7, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Take care my dear and I hope the path the Lord blesses you with is one that is filled with love and enrichment. I will miss your talent here on DA and on Tumblr. May God be there for you always and forever.
Magic-Waffles Featured By Owner Nov 7, 2012
Take care Alex :) everyone here on DA is really gonna miss you! :cries:
I really admire your determination to do this. Good luck and may the lord be with you! :D
ArtBySL Featured By Owner Nov 7, 2012
God bless you, I will miss your upbeat images. I am a major fan of your "Dear Future Husband" and love how your so outspoken about your faith when so many people feel they cant. I will miss that too. That is exactly why I dont have a tumblr and why I left DA a few years back. I understand but try not to stay away to long we need people like you. Good luck with everything. = ) <3
PsalmSeven Featured By Owner Nov 7, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
I have so much respect for what you said here, and I'm really glad you shared it because it shows me I'm not alone. The Lord has put me under a similar conviction. That's why I said in my most recent journal that I'm going to disappear for a while. I need some me-and-God time to straighten my priorities and examine my motives on dA. I hope that if you come back for a peek, you will see this and be encouraged. You're doing the right thing. May God continue to bless you, my friend. :hug:
shock777 Featured By Owner Dec 26, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
you too!! :)
Angel-Dust-Ryuuki Featured By Owner Nov 7, 2012  Student General Artist
Don't delete me on skype. I support your decision to fallow god and choose your own path. Good luck :)
xXGoldenNinjaXx Featured By Owner Nov 7, 2012  Hobbyist
May the Lord guide you through your struggles dear friend. You are in our prayers.
dorkinabubble Featured By Owner Nov 7, 2012  Student General Artist
Hey...thanks for this :) I know that I just started watching you, but, honestly, I can relate. This has spurred me on to be more serious too. A few years ago, I put away many things from my life as well. Yet...things creep up on you, you know? I'm trying (though not very well) to enforce a youtube ban on myself every week. I can only look at fun stuff on Sunday. Maybe I should just ban it completely until Sunday, I don't know. I'm sorry, I don't mean that to sound weird. I just want to start living for God's goals too :) We don't have much time. We need to stop living in fear and start living in the light that God has given us. He lifts us up from our mistakes and tells us that we should live in His love because he has freed us. Guess I'm just talking to myself now, ah ha :) Anyway...I'll be praying for you. Thank you for the encouragement :heart:
shock777 Featured By Owner Nov 7, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
:) ur welcome and good on u!!! :) u can do anything thru christ! :D
CertifiedJesusFreak Featured By Owner Nov 7, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
I'm gonna miss your Dear Future Husbands! They always made me smile! But I understand - I've actually been debating about shutting down my tumblr for a while - dA isn't so much of a problem for me, but Tumblr...yeesh. Talk about a life-sucker.

May the Lord bless you in everything you try to do! :D
QuinnyBot Featured By Owner Nov 7, 2012  Student General Artist
I wish you a lot of luck and I hope things will go well for you :)
Jehuthy Featured By Owner Nov 7, 2012
Thanks for all the cool work you have been doing all this time! I really enjoyed them (OCs Im gonna miss you!) Ill always be a fan no matter what happens and I hope everything works out for you in the end! Take care of yourself alex! Always stay creative :D
SirPerryBerry Featured By Owner Nov 7, 2012  Hobbyist Artist
going to miss you shocky but what you have to do is what you have to do shocky in the end it is your life and you can do what you want :) i wish you luck! and everything! i hope you do everything you wish and hope to do x3!
Alicia-x-Itachi Featured By Owner Nov 7, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Awww, you will be missed--but it is admirable that you're as dedicated to your faith as you are. I feel just as strongly in my beliefs, and I admire those who stand up for God.

You'll be in my prayers--may God guide you in your ways.
tekitomadachi Featured By Owner Nov 7, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
I know exactly what you're going through- the more I got closer to God, the more he told me to get rid of stuff (like naruto and fruits basket) when I was younger since at the time it was an obsession. I hope and pray that God continues to strengthen you in all that you do from now on, and that he will let you know when you are ready to start posting stuff again. :) In the meantime, all I can advise is that you continue to put on the armor of God and to draw close to him as you try to strengthen the relationship with him. God bless and stay safe! :hug:
Epicninja78 Featured By Owner Nov 7, 2012  Student Digital Artist
Good luck Shock!! You're way stronger than I am, clearly... I don't believe dA has taken over my life, but I understand where you're coming from. You'll be very much missed and I hope you can straighten things out! Plz don't delete me on Skype (unless you want to ^^) I'd like to keep in touch. :)
But I WILL keep you in my prayers, I promise!!! ♥
Madmangamer364 Featured By Owner Nov 7, 2012
You'll be missed, but again, I admire the fact that your faith means so to you AND that you're so willing to act on it. God knows your needs and desires, so I'm confident that this will be a worthwhile leave for you, and at the same time, perhaps you'll be on your way to finding that purpose that God has for you. The key is that you're taking that crucial first step towards a stronger spiritual self, and that in itself means a lot.

You'll be in my prayers, as well, as I have nothing but good vibes about what you're doing and the person you're trying to become. All I can do is support and applaud your efforts and hope that the Lord's grace and love will do the rest, which I'm sure they will. :)
PonchoFirewalker01 Featured By Owner Nov 7, 2012
I understand, Alex :D :hug:
But when you said about the "little Jesus" thing, I'd imagine you hugging a little Jesus Chibi XD
Dican Featured By Owner Nov 7, 2012  Student General Artist
Now. I understand why you are doing this but, Tumblr is obvious cause on there you can post just about anything. They have no limits on images like DA does, but the pornographic images leaking through DA is all the Admin's fault. What they find pornographic may be something completely different than what we say it is. I have seen some very pornographic images on here and reported it and they don't do anything, or they say that it was already deleted. But, anyway, this is going to be a hard month for me seeing as I'm not going to see anymore of your new work being posted. I love your drawing style and coloring style. IT'S AMAZING! I just hope this goes well and the month ends quickly.
Jmac615 Featured By Owner Nov 7, 2012
I understand. May god put you on the path he has for you. See you around Shock( maybe). P.s. sorry I didn't send you a voice for your character. I just lost track I guess. Take care.- Jmac
InsaneBoredGuy Featured By Owner Nov 7, 2012
:) Good for you Alex. Come back to us as an enlightened individual for us ja?
shock777 Featured By Owner Nov 7, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
i will
KajininNoKonoha Featured By Owner Nov 7, 2012
I don't really know what to say but.....take care, and God bless your future.

Thanks for all the fun! :)
nami-hyuga Featured By Owner Nov 7, 2012  Student Digital Artist
I'm crying right now. So touching. I promise I will pray for you. Honestly you have touched my life more than almost anyone. I just want to say something, if you feel this strongly about then I support you. I know how you feel. I'm 15 and I see that stuff all around me. Bless you don't sound crazy one bit. I'm a firm believer that not all cute romantic stuff you think up is sinful only if it is becoming an idol which it might be for you. Please remember the verse: 'I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.' please get back on track with our father and I will be awaiting your return. Please don't feel like you must please everyone because I know we feel that if you don't want to do that is fine. May god be with you my sister <3. :iconhugsplz:
shock777 Featured By Owner Nov 7, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
thank u so much ;v; i know that if the lord prompts me to leave dA completely, i will come back and let all know. i wont just disappear. so rest assured-Im not leaving completely ;v; just..for a break.
nami-hyuga Featured By Owner Nov 7, 2012  Student Digital Artist
No problem whatsoever
Wolfiegakakitai Featured By Owner Nov 7, 2012  Student Digital Artist
You've made a good decision. We'll look forward to seeing you back.
Lord bless and keep you~ ^__^
TeamShikaIno Featured By Owner Nov 7, 2012  Hobbyist
I agree, if you feel God wants you to leave this behind, then you should. Good luck with everything and God bless you~
1UPYoshi Featured By Owner Nov 7, 2012  Student Digital Artist
I'll be praying for you and good luck :)
tatsunin Featured By Owner Nov 7, 2012
Good luck Alex
NaomiGower Featured By Owner Nov 7, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
This made me cry. I know exactly how you feel. I will be praying for you! Good luck! May God bless you! <3
shock777 Featured By Owner Nov 7, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
ur welcome! thanks so much ;v;
NaomiGower Featured By Owner Nov 7, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
:D Welcome too! Good luck!
FelgrandKnight34 Featured By Owner Nov 7, 2012
Good luck :) I know what you mean with Tumblr, I look up pokemon and I get some... weird pictures that ruin my childhood.
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November 7, 2012


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