Praise Lord Jesus....Praise God for this week. I've got tears in my eyes right now at how awesome God has blessed me and my friends. Read on For an AWESOME testimony to the truth. Sorry...but this is really long....




As you all know, Meagan and I have had a fight before in the past just a few weeks ago. And we nearly had another one, but I decided to pray about it and Meagan and I have begun to change and gotten closer to each other. People say God's love doesn't exist....Meagan is WALKING PROOF of God's love and influence in peoples lives. I'm not kidding you. The grace of God is at hand at my school. *tears stream down cheeks*

When I first met meagan i spent the night at her house in 10th grade....her family is hospitable and welcoming, but the next morning it became very disfunctional and unloving. Her parents were having a fight with myself and meagan in the living room listening to it. Her older brother is a great guitarist, but sometimes might make some bad decisions like we all do. Meagan felt embarrassed when her family fought. But I reflected it to my own family. My family is not perfect either and I always knew it would never be perfect. So meagan and I were similar.

Later on, I tried to witness to her at ~Riku103194's birthday party on halloween night 2008. But I wasn't yet prepared to witness. I had to go through a changing breakthrough before I was even able to talk to her. I learned this the hard way near the end of the year when my friends just about got sick of me trying to witness to them. They shut me out...didn't want to hear it anymore. And I can't blame them. I was naive. totally into myself....not into what their wants were. ~KtechHelvetiin was one of the people that I almost lost my friendship with because I was witnessing wrong to. And I didn't know it but over half of my friends hated what i was doing. As I look back on it, I see a big mistake on my part, but i am thankful for that because now I see what I should've done. and I am correcting my mistakes now.

So, a week ago.....Meagan came to school upset about her grandmother dying in the hospital...and about stress from school and pressure from friends. And then It came to me in my head: "My uncle dying...my aunt dying...My stress from teachers...My subluxation in my vertebrae....My family issues....All of that was for a purpose. It was all for this moment to comfort Meagan." I had gone through EVERYTHING she had gone through. I understood her just as if I was in her brain. I knew what she was feeling. She was upset she had tears in her eyes. And it's by the growth of my own spirit and the Grace of God that I got the confidence to place my hand on her shoulder, and pray for her in front of the class, and pray out loud to God in Heaven for her. I was consumed with tears. I prayed for her, not caring what people thought. I closed my eyes and poured my love onto her...and I prayed with her fpr a good 2 minutes or so after the bell rang to go to the next class. As I prayed for her, I felt a stirring in my heart, and She had felt it too. I could tell. I ended it with an "amen" and looked at her face that had tears starting to roll down her cheeks. She and I hugged and I offered her to call me whenever she needed help. After that, it seemed like the next few days things with her problems had dwindled down a bit. That was the first step.

After that, we continued texting and we were buddy-buddy. We talked about the newest naruto manga chapters and talked like we always used to. Nothing seemed to change...until one day a week ago that Meagan was gone from school. At lunch time, I recieved a text message from her saying "Alex I desperately need your help." At this point, i didn't care if I got in trouble for using my phone at school. I took it out and By God, I sure did call her.

"meagan, what's wrong?"
"I..I just had a terrible nightmare like the holocaust and it made me lonely and freaked out...I just need someone to talk to right now."

Simple enough topic. We talked for a few minutes about that, but then somehow, it escalated into a talk about God. And people were in the classroom around me...~demetria656 came in and I never talked to her the whole lunch period. (unintentional, but hey when God calls you to witness, you witness! ) I don't remember the exact conversation i had with her, but I said stuff along the lines of "Meagan-you are worth so much more than you give yourself credit for. You are beautiful. You are amazing--A star, a gem. You are amazing and don't let things get you down." I could hear the shakiness of her voice on the phone. She said with a teary voice, "Alex...whenever I talk to you i somehow feel so much better." THAT MADE MY DAY So much more excellent. I smiled, and the tears started to pour.

"Meagan, I don't have the power to heal you. Only God does."
"You know alex, when you used to talk to me about religion I always hated it, I got annoyed and sick of it...but now it doesn't seem to bother me anymore..."

At this point, I'm thinking, "Holy crap. This is a miracle." I sobbed for a second, and very shakily i whispered, "Praise Jesus."

"Meagan--How I used to talk to you about religion was wrong of me. I wouldn't be having this conversation with you if i hadn'tve gone through bad times and that fight we had. It made us THIS much closer. With every bad thing that comes in life, God outweighs it with the Good. And I believe God has called me to help you through this. Because I don't want you to go through what I've gone through."

After that, I heard a giggle on the phone line. I smiled.

"Meagan-Why are you laughing??"

"I...I dunno....i just feel really happy for some reason. This warm feeling in my chest..."

And at that, I knew..I JUST KNEW God's hand was upon her. He was proving his presence to her. I laughed too, feeling the warmth in my soul, and I laughed and cried, in awe. "Praise Jesus. Thank you Lord Jesus!" was the only thing I could say...my lips couldn't say anything else. Everytime I said "Jesus", Meagan would LAUGH THAT MUCH LOUDER. Praise God, AMEN?!?! For God to touch her and to heal her that day...confirmed that God is with us always and he can get through to anyone's heart. Before I hung up that phone she said, "Alex if you were here right now I'd be crying on your shoulder." And I teared up more and replied, "It's okay cause I'd hold you and tell you that i love you, and I'd cry right along with you." That was the second step.

So we're even more close now than ever before. The beginning of this week...I started a casual talk about my experience at spirit west coast. I said "It was like a perfect world because God's love was inside everyone there. No one was angry or evil. no one would steal, no one would think of doing anything wrong." And then suddenly she said, "Alex it'd be cool if you and I could create a Utopia." A perfect world. Only Jesus could provide the anwer to this world in trouble. I smiled, brim to brim the biggest smile. Later that night and the course of 2 days i wrote her lyrics to Jeremy Camp's song "Let it Fade" ([link])and Johnny Diaz's song "More beautiful you" ([link]) and gave them to her in a note. She really soaked in the words, and I played her the songs. Tuesday or so, She said "hey it's funny Alex, I had those songs stuck in my head all day. I thought they were cool." I smiled and felt that warm feeling too. During Art class on wednesday, I sat next to ~Riku103194 and Meagan. Working on our art project, I was suddenly overcome with God's presence. I started laughing and crying.

"What's wrong, alex?"
"nothing meagan! I-I'm just so happy right now I could cry!!"

She started laughing, and smiled at me. I started having another oppurtunity to witness, so i said, "you know...God's love is just really stroking my heartstrings.....I'm being filled with his presence. The soul can never be satisfied. You could try drugs, alchohol, sex, violence and money to satisfy yourself, but without God, you will never fill the void in your heart that you have without God." And Autumn added that she knew what that happiness felt like when she was with ~Joshua-Fox (her boyfriend.) Meagan looked over at me on the table and said, "Me and Alex know what it feels like, huh Alex? To have that void fills?" I smiled with a tear in my eye and said back to her, "Yes meagan. God touched you. He has shown you that you could have more of that love in your life...." and she said, "exactly. There's like...no way to explain why or how you're unbelievably happy, it just...happens....The other day after we were on the phone, I just sat in my room and asked myself, 'Why am I so Happy? I don't even know why!!'" I couldn't help but feel God moving through me in that classroom that day. God is amazing, Amen??

Thursday after lunch, I wrote her the lyrics to Matthew West's song "The motions" ([link]) and I gave it to her passing period. I have yet to play her the song, but after I post this journal I'm going to compile my favorite influential christian songs onto a cd for her. I texted her afterschool, and she said the lyrics were cool. Pretty good. I asked her, "I'm not overwhelming with you with all this religion stuff am I? I don't want you to be offended. Tell me to stop if you ever get sick of it!" and she wrote back, "zenzen!!" ( it means "not at all" in japanese.) I smiled thee biggest smile ever. and felt that God's spirit again.

Then, Lastnight. I prayed to God, "Show me what you want me to do tomorrow. And please help Meagan too God. She's turning to you more and more and I am so thankful for it." I woke up this morning, having a strong feeling of Rape and violation.....it sounds dirty, i know...but I began contemplating rape and what would happen if i ever went through it....This proved to be a message from God as I later found out today.

I had an urge to read my bible before school today and I did and I even took it to school with me. Art class started out as usual...We were working on our projects, and i pulled a chair to sit next to meagan and autumn and another chick (whose name i don't know...) and non-challantly began drawing...Meagan was a little depressed in the first time in a week...So I prayed for her and after that class she felt better. But before that class was over, the girl next to meagan was crying. So i asked her, "What's wrong?" Apparently, Meagan already knew and she said, "Alex I don't know if i should tell you because it's kind of a big deal and I don't know if she's comfortable in telling you." The girl looked up at me, and said very weakly, "It's okay i'll tell you." Then, she explained to me, "A few months ago I was Raped by my best friend's cousin...And I found out yesterday that he might only get 4-5 months in jail...and that's not enough for what he did...he deserves more time than that..." I finally made that connection in my brain that God was somewhat preparing me for today....So I looked her in the eyes and said, "God told me something about rape but i didn't know what it was until you told me this. You don't think God's real, how would I know about this before I came to school? I don't really know you." I didn't see what meagan's reaction was to this but i knew she heard me. I told the girl that she was "beautiful in God's eyes and even though this man had done something terrible to her, Love is Forgiveness. And trust me, he'll probably have more problems in the future than you will. Karma sucks." She and Meagan giggled. "You are so much stronger than that man who did that to you. Don't let him frighten you, because if you do it just lets him know that you can let this get to you. You are worth much more and you need to know that God will send his angels to protect you. I will pray for you and I know God will help you through this." she smiled, and remained silent. The bell rang to go to 2nd period.

"okay, that's enough preaching for today alex" Meagan giggled in a joking manner.

"Sorry if i offended you, i just thought i'd help...haha..." I said. She smiled back. We walked to second period, and as we did, Meagan began to talk to me.

"Alex, you know it's cool. I was on my ipod yesterday and i was on the radio flipping through channels, and i landed on the christian channel. I listened to this guy preach, and it reminded me of you but I thought it was cool." I smiled even broader than before. I said, "Meagan, that's awesome!!" then she said, "I think God is happy with me today." And I smiled even more than before. I mean, My mouth couldn'tve grinned more!! I said, "Meagan-God loves you no matter who you are. He could never hate you no matter what, his love is unfathomable!!" and then She and I hugged, and I told her, "Meet me by mr. fisher's room at lunchtime. I'll take you to Youth Alive at lunch!" she's like, "okay!!" and that was the end of our conversation.

At lunch time today we sat in the library where the christian club Youth Alive was meeting. At first she attempted to do her math homework, but we were playing an irrisistably fun game she couldn't resist. We thumb-wrestled people for fake money to auction off and get real prizes of candy and so on. Meagan was laughing...the loudest person in the room if i wasn't....she was surprisingly really good and won a lot of people! After that we ended it in prayer and began walking to 4th period. As we walked, she looked at me and said, "you know Alex, I really enjoyed that today. That was so much fun, oh my god!! That was so much fun!!" I smiled and felt that warmth, and i thought "Oh Jesus, she's hanging out with the right people. Praise you God." I was amazed at how God was blessing me and my friend!! How blessed am I to actually SEE the fruits of my labor?!? God has been introduced to meagan...not because of me...because of my willingness to serve him... God is amazing, and he never ceases to amaze me. God's love is real, and I believe that Meagan is being carried in God's arms. Thank you all for your prayers and please continue them... I'm still praying for her, and i know that I'll need to have patience. It is only up to Meagan to decide to accept God as he is and all the love he has for her. I will not force it on her. The choice has GOT to be hers. I'm so blessed this week and I've had a great one! God bless you all for reading yet another one of my testimonies!! She went from not believing in anything, to contemplating life after death, to enjoying christian activities!! praise The Lord God on most high!!!

-alex-
November 20th 2009

*Happy birthday !!!!